Belly of the deepest love
by OtterAndTerrier
Summary: [COMPLETE] "So Snoke was watching our son." "Always," she told him. "From the shadows, in the beginning, even before I realized what was happening, he was manipulating everything, pulling our son toward the dark side. - Pregnant Leia has a bad feeling about this.
_"So Snoke was watching our son."_
 _"Always," she told him. "From the shadows, in the beginning, even before I realized what was happening, he was manipulating everything, pulling our son toward the dark side._

 **Belly of the deepest love**

The Millenium Falcon entered hyperspace and, minutes later, Han looked up and over his shoulder.

'We'll be reaching Ganthel in ten standard hours. Go get some rest, Sweetheart.'

Leia released herself from the crash webbing and stood, rubbing her lower back.

'And you?'

Han looked at Chewbacca.

'You mind? I'll replace you in a couple of hours.'

 _No need_ , Chewie said, showing his teeth in a smirk. _You know I don't sleep in short trips. You used to be the same. You've gone soft._

Han snorted and stood up, while Leia left the cockpit and started walking down the access tunnel.

'I haven't "gone soft"; I have to stand through a bunch of dead boring meetings without passing out. I need to get as much sleep as I can, pal.'

'I heard that,' Leia's receding voice said.

'That's 'cause I wasn't whispering,' Han called back, giving Chewie a last grin before he strode away to catch up with his wife. 'You know it's true.'

Leia's mouth twisted slightly as she tried not to show any signs of amusement.

'You should have thought about that before marrying a politician. Besides, you're the one who insists on being my escort.'

They reached the crew quarters and turned to face each other.

'My bad,' Han said, succeeding in making her laugh. 'You want something to eat first?'

The laughter died quickly to be replaced with a challenging look.

'We had dinner before we left,' Leia said, her tone even.

'And?'

'And I don't appreciate the insinuation.'

'Of what, that you might be hungry again?' Han asked, voice pitching in disbelief.

'That I've become an eating machine!' she said, placing her hands over her swollen stomach.

Han chuckled, though he promptly sobered when she narrowed her eyes at him.

'You're eating for two, Sweetheart, there's nothing wrong with that. I say do it while you can.'

'Right,' she huffed, shaking her head as she headed for the 'fresher.

She came out a while later wearing a loose sleep tunic and climbed into their usual bunk.

When Han left the 'fresher himself, he stood just outside the door for a moment, staring at Leia's closed eyes. In the dim lightning, he noticed there was a small frown creasing her forehead, and her fingers twitched over her belly. He was about to ask if she was all right when her expression changed, the frown relaxing and her mouth curving up softly the way he'd so rarely seen it do whenever he caught her having a deep, dreamless sleep. After she took a couple of deep breaths through her nose, she finally opened her eyes and found Han where he still stood.

'You okay?'

'Yes,' she said, giving him a half smile. 'Come here.'

In two strides, he'd reached the bunk and was squeezing in next to her.

'Were you in pain? Was he kicking?' Han asked, unable to ignore her strange behaviour.

'No, it's... something else.' Leia sighed and turned on her side to face him. 'The baby—I've always been able to feel him there, physically and through the Force. But recently I've thought I could feel... well, something like his mind. His entity. I can feel when he's content and when he's uncomfortable, and I can reach out and—soothe him. I can do that... I just did that.'

Han realised he had been gaping and closed his mouth.

'That's impressive. Kid's not even born yet and you're already beating me to Best Parent.'

Leia laughed softly, but when she looked at him, he could tell that wasn't all.

'I suppose. But... every day, I feel that what Luke told us is right. That our baby will be strong in the Force, too.'

Han put a hand on her stomach and rubbed it soothingly.

'We've talked about this. So what? _You're_ strong in the Force, but you chose not to become a Jedi, and you're doing fine. Luke and you didn't know about it till you were fully grown. Our kid will be the same. When he's old enough, he can choose what he wants to do. We're not sending him away.'

'I know. I'm not sending him away,' she repeated, with the same fierceness she had the day Luke had talked to them about that possibility. 'But what if it's not that simple?'

'What do you mean?' It was all pretty straight-forward to him.

'What if it's different from us? What if we just can't ignore it? Look at Luke and I. You can't escape it.'

Now it was Han's turn to sigh.

'Sweetheart, we still have years till we have to worry about it. Let's not think about that so much, all right? Stop living in the future.'

'That's what you always tell me,' she said with a wry smile. 'This time you might be right.'

'Just this time?' he asked with a mock-hurt expression.

She ignored him, closing her eyes for a moment as she tried to let go of her worry. Then she scooted closer and tucked her head under his chin.

'All right. Let's get some sleep.'

But as she'd told him, as she'd come to discover for herself during the past two years, you couldn't ignore the Force, and even as she fell asleep, the hollow feeling in her gut didn't go away.

More than seeing, she felt the shadow looming over her, the fingers of darkness extending towards her. She wanted to scream, wanted to get away, but she was paralyzed. It broke into her mind, not exactly prying, not communicating anything, more like a warning.

 _I'm here. I'm waiting._

Who or what it was, Leia couldn't have said, but it filled her with terror.

The shadows sank deep into her body, reaching for the other mind inside of her, and that was more terrifying than anything else.

There was an oppressing sensation in her chest, and with a desperate gasp for air, she finally opened her eyes, heart thumping wildly.

'What's wrong?' Han asked from above her, and she realised he had sat up and was frowning at her with concern.

She breathed in and out, until the panic that had woken her up faded, before she managed to say, 'Nothing. I'm fine. It was nothing.'

When he looked like he didn't believe her, she added, 'The baby is fine and it's not coming yet. I'm fine,' Leia repeated, and this time the words rang untrue even to her. 'I just need some water.'

'If you're sure...' Han said, getting out of the bunk and turning to the galley in the corner.

She wasn't sure of anything, and that was why she couldn't mention it to him. She still had trouble telling her dreams apart from her visions, and even if whatever she had experienced was the later, she didn't know what it meant. She hadn't even seen anything or anyone, what threat they might pose, only darkness on darkness. The only thing she was sure of was the feeling of terror and helplessness that had washed over her.

The old fear of bringing a child of her own into the galaxy, a child with her blood and legacy, a fear she'd believed she had shed long ago, invaded her again.

'Leia, are you sure you're fine? You're pale,' Han said, peering down at her.

She took the water he was holding out for her and gulped it down, then handed back the mug and said, 'Yes. Bad dream, that's all.'

Han left the mug on the floor at the foot of the bunk and climbed back in next to her. She was about to chide him into reaching out and putting it back on the galley, but he was already wrapping his arms around her, so she chose to yield to the comfort they offered.

'It's all right, Sweetheart. We're here with you.'

She almost felt bad for letting him believe she'd had one of her regular nightmares, something he was used to, but she refused to make him worry needlessly. They _were_ having a baby, a decision they had both made, mindful of every potential risk, but wanting it all the same, and there was nothing to do now but make sure no harm would come his way. Even if, as she knew, there was no escaping destiny, they would do their best to guide their child for as long as they could, and hope that was what made all the difference.

* * *

 **A/N:** The quote at the top pretty much explains how I came up with this. I'm sorry, and also for the lamest title I could have thought of (I stole it from a song, nice). Thanks a lot to **hewouldve** , who was my beta this time!


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